Day 18 - 25 Days of Christmas

Day 18 of the 2018 25 Days of Christmas giveaway series is now up! :) Please check out the linked post to read more about how you can win a gift worth over $500 in value!




*Not my photo

I love plain wrapping paper with a little bit of pizzazz, because it feels clean, yet not boring. Wrapped with a bit of twine, it brings out a bit of rustic feels, and I sometimes do enjoy adding a little bit of added dinglydangles with it for personality.

--

Thoughts of an INFP


As a psych major, I thought it would be nice to talk a little bit about something psychology related on this blog. I think that in those around me, the Myer Briggs test has been coming up a lot. For those of you who don't know, Myer Briggs is a test that is used to measure a person's personality. Obviously, each person is not confined by 4 letters, but it is a good prerequisite gauge of the person's reactions and innermost world. It gives you a sense of how to better understand and communicate with yourself and others. The test is separated by four categories: Introversion/Extroversion, Intuition/Sensing, Feeling/Thinking, Perceiving/Judging


I've always tested to be a severe INFP, where all of my percentages come out to over 90%, but when my friends answer for me, their views of me tend to be an INTJ or an INTP.


Yesterday, at a small group gathering, we were talking about this Myer Briggs personality test, and listening to people talk about their personalities really made me wonder. I think I confused a lot of people too. I felt so deeply connected to a fellow INFP -- our love of writing and literature, how we both wrote a book, aspired to leave the 9-5 work place in pursuit of our more creative outlet... But my thoughts were also very drawn to the logic of the INTJ, and I found myself nodding and agreeing with the thought processes they presented. So what am I?


Let's talk about what it means to be Introverted: For me, I am very introverted. I find it nice and calming to just curl up on my own and write on this blog, read a book, watch a movie, doodle, or even learn something.


People who first meet me are actually very surprised that I'm an introvert, because I am used to being in people-oriented occupations. I taught, I did customer service, and I was a flight attendant. Nothing says "EXTROVERT!" in larger capitalized letters than a flight attendant! I'm supposed to be flying everywhere, flirting with cute first-class passengers, and making friends all over the world!


However, friends who have known me for a bit know that while I am very adaptable to my job functions, I need ten thousand million hours to recharge. I hate large crowds, and I would rather not wait in long lines, even if I am really looking forward to seeing what the front of the line has to offer. It could also, of course, be attributed to the fact that I am an impatient person, but I think it has more to do with the amount of people draining my energy. I don't mind waiting in an online queue.


I am that friend who does not want to answer you right away, because I am not ready for social interaction. But don't worry, I will! I feel bad if I don't respond right away, and I know that I might forget to respond if I put it off for too long. I don't want to make you feel bad, so I will just respond. I might add on to the response later after thinking and coming up with something else important or relevant. Unless you already changed the subject. Then, onwards!


I will not initiate contact with you for days... weeks... months at a time. Sometimes even years at a time. I keep my circle very small, and it's not that I don't love you. Chances are, I do! I just... got busy with other stuff, or drained by people I feel obliged to talk to (work, school, projects, etc.), and then I felt too socially awkward to reach out after a long time, because I actually have a small case of FOMO and I don't think you remember me. Please reach out to me so that I can not feel awkward.


iNtuition seems to also be something that all my friends can agree with.

So the difference between intuition and sensing is that intuition is... going with your gut intuition. Sensors just go off of their past experiences. Intuitive people are great with abstract things -- ideas and concepts are easy to understand and are preferable. Sensors need details. The best way of looking at this is: intuitive people prefer essay questions, because we are able to BS something from the concepts and big ideas we understand. Sensors like multiple choice questions because they do well with details. **I can attest to the fact that I hated multiple choice questions, because the details just made me overthink and answer wrong. I loved essay questions. **


How intuition manifests itself into my life is probably just the fact that I can't deal very well with details. I am very detail oriented, but only in the scope of what I want detailed and what I believe needs to be detailed. This sounds very awkward to explain, so let's give an example.


My friend is a HUGE Sensor. For her, her current relationship gives her a lot of anxiety because she keeps thinking back to her previous relationship. Every little thing her current beau says and does triggers her thoughts back to something that her ex had done, and it freaks her out.


As an intuitive person, (I guess me being on the outside looking in also has to do with it) I can see parallels, but I also compartmentalized them into different people. Therefore, I see that have different ideals, motives, and purposes.


I know this can sound like a very Sensor-bashing situation, but I think she's smart. She has alarm bells going off that helps her to keep her safe. As an intuitive person, I think it is good to be able to give people the benefit of the doubt and not compare, but I can also end up very hurt. You win some, you lose some, right?


Feelings are something that apparently most of my friends don't think I am. Let's tackle a bit of how feelings manifest into my personality, and whether or not I am actually a Thinker.


Thinkers think of feelers as people living in LalaLand, believing that the world is going to be able to function on compassion. We are those fluffy bunnies who cry when the evil person in movies are served a slice of justice, and can't control ourselves.


Feelers think of thinkers as crazy psychopaths who have no empathy and just use logic to argue why it was right to kill that poor, misunderstood personmajig.


Yesterday, we talked about the most stereotypical question in differentiating Feelers from Thinkers: "Would you have a hard time firing an under-performing or loyal employee?"


My answer: It would be extremely hard for me to do... but I would.


I don't let others see my feelings very easily, and I tend to cram it all on the inside and try to hold back my feelings in personal circumstances. (If I'm watching a movie or reading a book, let the tears flow!) In this kind of situation, I will be freaking out on the inside, and my emotions will be flitting towards the employee's family, the holidays, our friendship, etc.etc.


But, I will also analyze the fact that keeping this person in a job they are not well suited for will not be helpful to either him/her, or the company. I will be able to very calmly tell him/her that the job is not a good match for them, but we are more than willing to give them a great letter of recommendation. I will give them a choice to resign or be let go, and if they choose to be let go, I will offer a bigger pay advance than the standard 2 weeks.


What people don't see is the huge jumble of emotions that will be manifesting in my heart and mind prior to taking action, and they also won't see the huge burdening amount of guilt in my heart weighing me down after bidding farewell and best wishes to the employee.


Am I a very emotional thinker? Or am I just a practical feeler?


Perceivers like seeing the big picture of things, whereas Judgers prefer to have specific structure.


I am usually fairly neutral about things, and even when I am passionate about something, I have put a lot of thought into things, before committing to a viewpoint. Even then, I am open to debate and convincing. While this makes me a perceiving person....


I do see how others see me as a judger, because I like my coloured pencils and markers and papers in a specific order! Do not mess it up, or I will be sad :( I also colour code my clothing by style. I get very frustrated when it is not in order. I also love cleaning, and seeing things messy can completely throw me off.


So what do you think I am? And what personality type are you? :) I'd love to know!